Woman About Sex

Anal Lovemaking: Top 5 Anal Sex Toys!

Nellioness — Sun, 27 Jun 2010 14:46:17 +0000

Although anal sex is still making some people blush, millions of men and women often engage in anal lovemaking and are actively involved with anal sex toys. Today let me describe top five anal sex toys designed to enhance your anal pleasure and help you break this sexual ‘taboo’, if you have not done so already ;) This post is for those ladies and gentlemen who just start, or are ready to start, their journey into the naughty and “forbidden” world of anal sex. Here we go – top 5 anal sex toys for your anal joys!

BUTT PLUGS

A butt plug is one of the most popular anal sex toys even known to the world. The butt plug is a dildo-shaped sex toy with a flared end, designed to be used for anal stimulation. Butt plugs come in a variety of colors, materials, shapes, sizes, and textures. Generally, there are penis-shaped butt plugs, ribbed butt plugs, and vibrating butt plugs. Some butt plugs are designed for men to stimulate the prostate. Some butt plugs include a tail attached to the base of the plug. The most important idea of the butt plug design is the flared base that prevents the sex toy from getting stuck or lost in you. Butt plugs are used by both sexes and all sexual orientations.

ANAL BEADS

Anal beads are cute and sexy and look like a necklace. This is the anal sex toy consisting of several small balls attached together by a piece of nylon cord or other type of strong rope-like material. Anal beads are used by inserting bead by bead into the anal canal. Anal beads are commonly made of silicone, plastic, rubber, glass or metal. This anal sex toy ends with a ring or similar handle designed for easy pulling. The other purpose of this ring is to prevent the sex toy from becoming fully lodged in the rectum. Some people enjoy having sex with anal beads inside. Anal beads are great to use by both men and women, and all sexual orientations.

ANAL VIBRATORS

You can choose to explore your anal potential with anal vibrators. Anal vibrators, as the name suggests, are vibrators designed to be used for anal penetration. The average size of the anal vibrator may vary from 4-6″ long and about 1 inch wide. Anal vibrators may pulsate, rotate, and vibrate in different speeds and levels. As well as anal beads and butt plugs, anal vibrators may be used by both men and women of all sexual orientations.

ANAL PROBES

Anal probes can be a lot of visual and physical fun. Anal probes are long anal sex toys. Anal probes are great choice for those who are able to insert lengthy things in the butt. Anal probes provide the delicious sensation of fullness. There are anal probes made of glass, jelly, rubber silicone, wood and the highest quality medical-grade steel (which is completely hypoallergenic, heavy and durable). There are curvy and flexible anal probes that are easier to insert and are the great choice for anal sex toy beginners.

PROSTATE MASSAGERS

Prostate massage is one of the most pleasurable activities for men. Prostate massagers are meant for massage of the male prostate gland for sexual stimulation and medical purposes. Prostate massage can be done solo and with partner’s help. This sensual and erotic massage leads to deeper orgasmic pleasure for a man. The prostate gland is located on the front wall of the anal canal and is called the male G-Spot. The prostate is responsible for a man’s erection and ejaculation. Prostate massagers come in a wide range of types. For example, Nexus offers the finest range of prostate massagers of different size, form and functionality. Whether you are new to prostate massage or experienced, Nexus has something for everyone.

Explore your back door with anal sex toys and do not forget to use loooots of lubrication! ;)

Vaginal and Anal Bleaching – Safe Or Not?

Nellioness — Thu, 24 Jun 2010 15:19:54 +0000

Anal and vaginal bleaching is becoming more and more popular nowadays. Although anal and vaginal bleaching is mainly performed by strippers, bodybuilders, models, celebrities and those ladies and gentlemen in the porn industry, more and more ordinary women (and some men) turn to this procedure because almost everyone wants to look their best when it comes to things sexual and erotic.

Anal bleaching refers to the lightening, in other words, bleaching of skin around the anus to get rid of dark pigmentation, for enhancing the beauty of that sensual and sensitive anal area. Vaginal bleaching, as the name suggests, refers to the lightening of the skin around the vagina, for cosmetic purposes as well.

Bleaching creams active ingredients

Most of the bleaching creams contain hydroquinone and other chemicals that can lead to skin reactions. Some bleaching creams contain somewhat “safe” ingredients such as Niacinamide (Vitamin B3), Mulberry Extract, Bearberry Extract, Lemon Juice Extract, Lactic Acid.

Hydroquinone is an ingredient, found in most of the bleaching creams. Hydroquinone, or benzene-1,4-diol and quinol, is an organic compound which is a type of phenol. Hydroquinone may cause severe side effects in our body such as, for example, liver damage and thyroid disorder. Any skin-lightening product containing hydroquinone must be avoided. Hydroquinone is also used in photo processing and rubber manufacturing, by the way.

Meladerm is the latest skin-lightener and pigment reducing complex. Meladern is used on the face and body to remove unwanted age spots, birthmarks, tans, dark elbows, underarms, etc. Meladern includes Vitamin B3, Mulberry Extract, bearberry extract, lemon juice, emblica powder, lactic acid and glycolic acid. Meladern does not contain Hydroquinone.

How anal bleaching creams work

Our body naturally produces the substance that gives our skin and hair the color. The substance is called Melanin. The more melanin is produced in the body, the darker the skin. Also, Melanin provides a natural protection against the harmful effects of ultraviolet rays of the sun. The thing is that Hydroquinone and other lightening chemicals inhibit the skin’s production of melanin, lightening the applied skin area. Bleaching agents temporarily lighten skin color, and exposure to sunlight may create a darker appearance than before. This is why you should not come to the sunlight after the skin bleaching procedure.

Is anal and vaginal bleaching safe?

Although some beauty salons advertise safety of the procedure, anal and vaginal bleaching is NOT safe. The bleaching procedure is done by the application of a bleaching cream to that sensual intimate skin. The active ingredients in the bleaching creams contain harmful chemicals that can lead to serious side effects. By the way, anal bleaching is banned in some countries.

Be very, very, very careful and extra cautious if you decide to perform anal and vaginal bleaching. In fact, beatifying your ass can become the pain in the ass. Although most bleaching creams advertise safety, think twice before using them. When it comes to making your privates prettier by using bleaching creams, there are risks that may outweigh the benefits.

Just look in the mirror and you may discover how beautiful and naturally sexy your privates are. Look in the mirror and say – Damn I’m sexy! ;)

Sex Glossary: Sexual Definitions Every Adult Should Know – Letter N!

Nellioness — Fri, 28 May 2010 07:11:07 +0000

Hello there, my sexy friends. How are you? I have been absent in the blog world for too long. It’s been a very busy time lately so I apologize for my long absence and not updating the site. My health problems and family matters have completely taken over my life, so I just really had no time and no inspiration for blogging, unfortunately.

But now I am back :) And I am back with a new sex glossary. I know, I know, you are tired from all those sex terms, but still let me finish my sex glossary series. Want it or not, but today you have sexual words and terms beginning with lovely letter N. Guess why “N” is my favorite letter? ;))

In my previous sex glossary post, I’ve offered a list of sexual words starting with letter M. Today’s glossary contains nine definitions of sexual practices, nipple devices, and more. Although most of the words are well known, still let me hope that someone will find something new to learn and try out. As usually, for my first-time readers, let me point out that most definitions are simplified and described briefly. All my glossaries are intended for general audience and for general information purposes only.

Increase your sexual vocabulary and do not forget to check out my previous lists, including the latest list of letter-M definitions. I’m always open to your suggestions, corrections and sexy comments. If you have any other terms to add to my lists – feel free to post them in the comment section! So here we go!

Sexicon for lovers and others: LETTER N

NIPPLE CLAMPS: A nipple clamp is a clamp used to stimulate the nipples by applying varying degrees of pressure. The basic principle of nipple clamping is the restriction of blood flow to the nipple in order to heighten the nipple sensitivity. There are adjustable and non-adjustable, non-vibrating and vibrating nipple clamps; tweezer nipple clamps, clover nipple clamps, beaded nipple clamps, bell nipple clamps, etc. Although nipple clamps are often used in BDSM sexuality, in fact, nipple clamps can be also used by anybody who enjoys having their nipples stimulated. Nipple clamps come in a variety of styles and types. When it comes to wearing nipple clamps, it is very important to find a personal balance between the amount of pain and pleasure. For pleasurable application, it is advisable that nipple clamp beginners should not use clamps longer than 10 minutes at a time. During the nipple clamping watch carefully for skin discoloration and temperature change. Remove at once if they cause prolonged discomfort, swelling, or discoloration of the skin. Play safe!

NIPPLE HUGGERS: Nipple huggers are adjustable non-piercing nipple shields made from copper based wire. Nipple huggers are applied with pressure and held on by tension. These sensual beauties can be shaped to fit the contours of almost any type of nipple, however, preferably, your nipples should not be inverted or flat. Nipple huggers not only look sexy, they provide pleasurable sensation to the nipple and areola!

NIPPLE CLIPS: Nipple clips are delicate non piercing nipple arousers that are suitable for all types of female nipples because nipple clips can open and close to accommodate a range of nipple sizes. Nipple clips come in various designs, but the main idea of a nipple clip is stimulating the nipple via pinching pressure. Nipple clips are especially comfortable for the ladies with small or inverted nipples. These lovely things make the nipple more pronounced. To place the clips, open the clip slightly and slide in your nipple until it is at the top of the U-shaped piece of metal. Adjust for a comfortable secure fit and enjoy!

NIPPLE PASTIES: Nipple pasties are adhesive coverings applied to cover a woman’s nipples. To place a pastie you have to peel of the backing and simply paste onto the nipple! Fun and cute, these nipple covers are ideal for a private dance, or as an alternative to sexy swimwear. They also work great with sexy lingerie or under a thin figure-hugging dress! Sexy nipple pasties are available in a variety of styles and shapes such as star-shaped nipple pasties, x-shaped, heart-shaped nipple pasties, etc. There are also nipple tassels, pasties that feature tassels which hang from the center. In fact, all types of nipple pasties are very, very fun!

NIPPLE ERECTION: Nipple Erection is the protruding of the nipples in both women and men as a result of sexual stimulation and arousal.

NOCTURNAL EMISSION: Nocturnal emission (also known as a “wet dream”) is when a man ejaculates in his sleep :)

NOONER: Nooner is a quickie during the lunchtime or midday, especially, that one taking place at the office environment

NECROPHILIA: Necrophilia, also referred to as necrolagnia, is the desire to have sex with dead people, in other words, it is a sexual attraction to corpses. The word is derived from Ancient Greek: nekros (”dead”), and philia (”friendship”).

NYMPHOMANIA: The word is used to describe a female psychological disorder characterized by an obsession with sex and hyperactive sex drive and desire. A woman who is sexually obsessed is referred as a “nymphomaniac”, “nympho” or “sex addict”. In men, this disorder is known as Satyriasis.

Finally, let me mention one more sexy word starting with letter N: Nellioness ;) See you ladies and gentlemen!

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Related articles:
Ten Ways To Arouse Your Woman Via Her Delicious Breasts And Nipples! – Want to know how to treat female breasts properly? Read on to see what pleasure techniques you can use on her!
The Breast Orgasm: Not Common, But Certainly Possible!
Nipple Clamps: Enjoyable Stimulation and Sexy Decoration For Women’s Breasts!

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Want to explore sensual potential of your nipples? ;) Than take a look at nipple and breast sex toys from EdenFantasys adult toys store!

Sex Glossary: Sexual Definitions Every Adult Should Know – Letter Mmmm!

Nellioness — Sun, 18 Apr 2010 14:49:51 +0000

Want it or not, I keep posting my glossaries of sexual definitions ;) Today we have sexual words and terms beginning with Mmmmm…

Just think of the words starting with this ‘orgasmic’ letter – Mutual Masturbation, Making out, Multiple orgasms. My list below offers over 10 letter-M words including slang words, vagina and penis nicknames, sexual practices, and much more. Although many words are well known, there’s a chance that someone will find here new ideas and expressions to be learned or even tried out tonight. As usually, for my first time readers, let me point out that most definitions are described briefly and simplified. All my glossaries are intended for general audience and for general information purposes only.

To be a good lover, we should be sexually aware and sexually intelligent, right? So, we have to know who’s who and what’s what in the world of love and sex. The primary idea behind my glossaries is that good sex is inspired by love and guided by sexual knowledge. Increase your sexual vocabulary and let me hope that my glossaries are somewhat helpful ;) I’m always open to your suggestions and corrections. Do not forget to check out my previous lists, including the latest list of letter-L definitions. Help me improve my glossaries by letting me know if there is something to add (word/term/phrase, etc)! Enjoy!

Sexicon for lovers and others: LETTER M

MASTURBATION: Masturbation… Masturbation is one of the most popular sexual acts performed to achieve arousal and receive sexual pleasure. The word is believed to derive from the Latin word ‘manus’ (hand) and ‘turbare’ (to disturb). Masturbation is stimulating, caressing and touching your own body (or your lover’s body) for arousal and sexual pleasure. Masturbation is the self-stimulation of your body’s most sensual parts and erogenous zones such as breasts, thighs, lips, buttocks, anus, penis, clitoris. It is exploring your own body and discovering your sexual potential.

People masturbate in lots of different ways. The masturbation can be performed manually. Many masturbate by rubbing against an object, such as a pillow. Some use various sex toys and vibrators to masturbate. Some ladies prefer pussy fingering. One of the masturbation techniques men enjoy is titty fucking which means thrusting/masturbating the penis between a woman’s breasts and ejaculate on her breasts or face. Men like to watch women masturbate because it can be a very sensual and beautiful scene. Tribadism, or scissoring, is a form of mutual masturbation between lesbians in which ladies are rubbing and pressing their pussies against each other. Tribadism is not only pussy-against-pussy rubbing, it is any form of pussy-rubbing against a partner’s body.

Masturbation is a great way to relieve sexual tension especially for people without lovers or those whose sweethearts are not available for sex right now. Many sex experts consider that both solo-masturbation and mutual masturbation can improve sexual relationships and sexual health. Although a natural form of sexual activity and a popular act, masturbation is labeled as sinful and still surrounded by taboo and myths. Whatever the myths and labels, obviously and fortunately, masturbation will never disappear :)

MUTUAL MASTURBATION: Mutual masturbation is masturbating/stimulating each other’s privy parts. Lovers may touch, caress, massage each other’s intimate spots and places. Mutual masturbation can also involve stimulating your own genitals while watching your lover stimulating himself/herself. There is also non-contact mutual masturbation when one lover is stimulating herself/himself while the other is watching, but not touching. Mutual masturbation can be done as a part of foreplay or simply as an alternative to casual intercourse. It is a wonderful way to learn more about each other’s pleasure-spots and discover each other’s sexual and sensual potential.

MENAGE A TROIS: A ménage à trois refers to a sexual activity and relationship involving three people, also known as a “threesome” (usually, 2 women with 1 man or 2 men and 1 woman). Ménage à trois is the French term which literally translates as “household of three”.

M.I.L.F.: MILF, or ‘Mom I’d Like to Fuck’, is a slang word used to describe a sexually attractive middle-aged woman (usually, she is between 35-50 in age). A MILF is not necessarily an actual mother. The word was popularized by the film American Pie:
While looking at a picture of Stifler’s mother:
MILF Guy #2: Dude that chick’s a MILF!
MILF Guy #1: What to hell is that?
MILF Guy #2: M-I-L-F Mom I’d Like to Fuck!
MILF Guy #1: Yeah dude! Yeah!

MISSIONARY POSITION: Missionary position (i wish i could think of a better term) is one of the most popular, intimate, comfortable and pleasurable sex positions ever, where the woman lies on her back with her legs spread and the man mounts her with his arms supporting his weight.

The missionary position is a man-on-top and face-to-face sex position named supposedly after the Christian missionaries who taught that man-on-top was the only natural and proper position for a man and woman to have sex. Tuscans refer to the position as “The Angelic Position” while some Arabic-speaking groups call it “the manner of serpents”. The ancient Chinese preferred male-on-top because of their belief that males were born face down and women were born face up. Before the term “missionary position” came into common use, this sex position was known by several names, for example, “the matrimonial”, “the mama-papa position”, “the English-American position”, and “the male superior position”.

Personally, the good old missionary is my all-time favorite. Although many find this sexual position “old-fashioned” and unimaginative, it is really popular and widely practiced by most lovers around the world. There are many variations of the missionary position which allow for different degrees of g-spot stimulation and the depth of penetration. Think the missionary position is boring? Take a look at my post where I describe the missionary position benefits and offer some really nice variations!

MULTIPLE ORGASMS: Multiple orgasms are having more than one orgasm (one after the other, consecutive orgasms) in a single sex session. It is true that a woman or a man can have multiple orgasms. Believe it or not, but I am proud to announce that I once experienced eight consecutive orgasms. I’m serious. Moreover, I believe that every woman has the capability of reaching such heights of sexual pleasure.

MARQUIS DE SADE: Marquis de Sade (1740-1814) was a French aristocrat and novel writer known for depicting sadistic and violent sexual fantasies in his writings. The term SADISM is derived from his name. Sadism is human behavior where one is feeling sexual excitement and receiving emotional pleasure from inflicting pain and watching pain inflicted on others. Marquis de Sade was a proponent of extreme freedom, unrestrained by morality, religion or law. Marquis de Sade was known for his sadistic behaviors that he described in his erotic novels. For about 32 years of his life Marquis de Sade spent in prisons and psychiatric hospitals.

MASOCHISM: Masochism is receiving pleasure from receiving pain. The term is derived from the name of an Austrian writer Leopold Ritter von Sacher-Masoch. Sadism and masochism are often known under the term “sadomasochism”, also S&M or SM. Sadomasochism is one of the three subdivisions of BDSM, which also involves B&D (bondage and discipline) and D/s (dominance and submission).

MASTER/MISTRESS: Master and mistress, also known as “top” or “dominant”, are words usually used in BDSM terminology. In a BDSM relationship, “master” or “mistress” is a person who derives erotic pleasure from temporary and consensual control over another person. In other words, this partner takes a controlling role in a BDSM relationship or a BDSM scene. The person who takes the passive role is known as submissive partner, also known as a “bottom”.

MASTILAGNIA: Mastilagnia is deriving sexual pleasure from being whipped or from the desire of being whipped.

MONS PUBIS: Mons pubis, also known as mons veneris or simply the mons, is the area above a woman’s vulva which is covered with pubic hair. The term “mons veneris” means ‘mound of love’ and comes from Latin words ‘mons’ (mound) and ‘veneris’ (Venus, a Roman goddess associated with love, beauty and fertility).

MUFF: Muff is a slang word for vulva. There are other letter-M words used to refer to a woman’s pussy such as Mantrap, Main Street, Manhole, Multi-Purpose Hall, Middle eye, Milk jug, Mine of pleasure, Miss Laycock, Modesty, Mound, Mrs. Winkles, Mouth that cannot bite, Mysterious cavern, Mysterious valley.

MAIN VEIN: Slang for a man’s penis. Other letter-M nicknames and words for penis are: Mr. “P”, Man in the man, Meat, Mister Man, Man’s mark, Mr. Big, Mr. Happy, Man with helmet and two bowling balls.

MASSAGE: Erotic massage is a highly sensual and magic experience. Erotic massage is the use of massage techniques to enhance sexual pleasure and heighten the body’s sensitivity. Erotic massages typically involve the stimulation of erogenous zones and caressing your lover’s privy parts. The ultimate purpose is not making your loved one relaxed and sleepy, but making him or her relaxed, excited and desiring for intimacy. Besides, erotic massage may be used professionally to help some men learn to control premature ejaculation. The main part of erotic massage is allowing your hands and fingers to work over your partner’s privy places.

In Tantric sexuality, there is a Lingam (penis) and Yoni (vagina) massage. As I’ve mentioned in my previous post, Lingam/Yoni massage is a special experience for both giver and receiver. It is a very sensual and honoring massage with the purposes of showing love and respect for your lover’s body and his/her penis/vagina, releasing your lover’s fears and expanding his or her ability to receive pleasure. Everyone likes to be touched in those most sensitive and intimate body places in that sensual kind of way. So, I believe giving an erotic and genital massage is one of the best skills one can develop.

And final “word” starting with letter M is “Mmm… mmmhp… mmmh mmmmph”, which is one of the sounds of people making love! Wishing you amazing and hot sex full of pleasure moans, groans and sounds! Oh, I’ve got one more letter-M word for you, just one word: Mwahh-Muahh! ;)

High Heels & Sexuality – Any Connection?

Nellioness — Thu, 15 Apr 2010 08:42:35 +0000

Claclunk-claclunk-claclunk… Most of women love wearing high heels and most men love high heels on women.

I’ve just bought a new pair of elegant shoes with high heels for a “high-heel occasion” I have to attend next weekend. I am a high-heel kind of woman and high-heeled shoes are my most adored form of footwear ever. High heels are an amazing and charming “weapon” in the female’s arsenal. Therefore, I decided to find out more about the connection between wearing high heels and sexuality. Why women love wearing high heels? Why do so many men love high heels on women? Is there anything good about wearing high heels? These questions crossed my mind and gave me idea for today. Let me first share with you a historical note from the all-knowing Wikipedia.

High heels invention dates back to…

Let’s just take a look at the historic background of high-heeled footwear. High heels have a varied history, and there are discussions and contradictions over when high heels were first invented. However, the fact is that high heels were worn by both women and men for many centuries. Some say that the first instance of the wear of high heels as fashion dates back to the marriage between Catherine de’ Medici and Henry II, later King of France. In 1533, at the age of 14, Catherine de’ Medici married Henry and wore heels made in Florence for her wedding. So, the women of the Duke’s court in France subsequently started wearing high heels. Persons who had authority and wealth wore heeled footwear. Around 1660, a shoemaker Nicholas Lestage designed high heeled shoes for Louis XIV. Some were more than four inches, and most were decorated in various battle scenes. Subsequently, high “Louis heels” became fashionable for ladies.

In the 18th century, during the French Revolution, heels became lower. During that time high heels became associated with opulence and people wanted to avoid the appearance of wealth. Therefore, heels were eliminated from the market for both men and women.

Fortunately, high heels returned in the 1980s to remain in fashion once and for all. Since then, ever changing variations of the high heels are NEVER out of fashion!

High heels and sexuality – is there any connection?

Is there anything good about wearing high heels? Well, I have discovered a 2008 study suggesting that there is a connection between high heels and sex life. The study looked at the physical benefits high heels may offer to ladies. They say that wearing high-heeled footwear may help exercise and strengthen the pelvic floor muscles. The thing is that the ability to receive orgasms and the intensity of an orgasm directly depends on the strength of the PC muscles. The PC muscle, aka the pubococcygeus muscle, is the muscle which contracts during orgasm. The PC muscle controls all sexual functions in both men and women. It forms and supports the urethra, bladder, vagina, penis, uterus and rectum. Therefore, a strong PC muscle can lead to stronger orgasms.

So, here’s the study itself. Interesting read. At least, for informational and educational purposes.

Wearing higher heels – although perhaps not stilettos – may improve your pelvic floor muscles and in doing so boost your sex life, a study suggests.

An Italian urologist and self-professed lover of the sexy shoe set out to prove that high heels were not as bad for women’s health as some suggest. The shoe has been linked to a range of problems – from corns to schizophrenia. But in a letter to European Urology, Dr Maria Cerruto, said her research showed it was time to stand up for the heel. She said her study of 66 women under 50 found that those who held their foot at a 15 degree angle to the ground – the equivalent of a two inch heel – had as good posture as those who wore flat shoes, and crucially showed less electrical activity in their pelvic muscles. This suggested the muscles were at an optimum position, which could well improve their strength and ability to contract.

The pelvic floor muscles are an essential component of the female body. As well as assisting sexual performance and satisfaction, they provide vital support to the pelvic organs, which include the bladder, bowels and uterus. But they often weaken after pregnancy and childbirth, and as the woman gets older. There are exercises to strengthen them, but Dr Cerruto hopes her findings may eliminate the need for these. “Women often have difficulty in carrying out the right exercises for the pelvic zone and wearing heels could be the solution,” she said. “Like many women, I like high-heeled shoes,” she added. “It’s good to know they have potential health benefits.”

Gill Brook, a women’s health physiotherapist in Bradford, stressed the findings did not suggest that stilettos were a good thing for those keen on improving their pelvic floor function. “But for women who like a slightly higher heel, these are reassuring findings – although we haven’t yet done away with the need for regular exercises to maintain what is such an important part of the female body.”

Finally, I have compiled a list of top reasons why ladies love wearing high heels and why do so many men love high heels on us.

Why women love wearing high heels – top reasons:

1. Wearing high-heeled shoes makes her hips move gracefully when walking
2. Wearing high-heeled shoes makes her breasts bounce gorgeously when walking
3. Wearing elegant high heels and stilettos improves her confidence
4. Wearing high heels improves her posture
5. High heels make her look taller and slimmer
6. High heels are the best way to look even more feminine
7. Many women like wearing stilettos in the bedroom or even while making love
8. Wearing high-heeled shoes makes her calf muscles more pronounced
9. Wearing high-heeled shoes provides the visual effect of longer and more shapely legs
10. Wearing high-heeled footwear accentuates the graceful curves of high arches
11. Wearing high heels adds sexiness… and sexual spice
12. Clicking of her heels is sexy and announces her presence
13. Wearing high heels makes her move in a more sexualized and seductive manner
14. Women wear high heels to attract men!

Why do so many men love high heels on women? Just one big reason is that high heels add to female attractiveness and sexiness. When a woman is in heels, she’s more vulnerable and she can’t run away from a man ;)

5 final quotes about high heels!

I don’t know who invented high heels, but all women owe him a lot. – Marilyn Monroe

You put high heels on and you change. – Manolo Blahnik (footwear designer)

High heels were invented by a woman who had been kissed on the forehead. – Christopher Morley

I was born in high heels and I’ve worn them ever since. – Helena Christensen

When I wear high heels I have a great vocabulary and I speak in paragraphs. I’m more eloquent. I plan to wear them more often. – Meg Ryan

Although wearing high heels is not that easy and all women out there remember that aching feet after a long day of wearing high heeled shoes, still women have a special relationship with high heels. The fact is that high heels will always be worn my ladies all over the world. Men will always love to see a woman walking in high heels. Claclunk-claclunk-claclunk ;)

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Sex Glossary: Sexual Definitions Every Adult Should Know – Letter L

Nellioness — Mon, 12 Apr 2010 18:14:35 +0000

Hello there my sensual readers! Well, I keep posting my glossaries of sexual definitions. Today let me share with you sexuality-related words beginning with L. In sexual vocabulary, there are so many hot words starting with this sensual letter… Love, Lovemaking, Lover, Lust… My list below contains even more letter-L words, so take a few minutes to read through it. Although many words are well known, there’s a chance that someone will find here new terms and expressions to be learned. I offer 8 sexual definitions including slang words, vagina synonyms, anatomical terms, and much more.

For my first time readers, let me point out that most definitions are described briefly, intended for general audience and for general information purposes only. I’m always open to your suggestions, corrections and comments. Do not forget to check out my previous lists, including the latest sex glossary with letter P definitions.

Be open and curious about things sexual and sensual. Improve your sexual vocabulary and performance. And, help me improve my sex glossaries by letting me know if there is something to add (word/term/phrase, etc)!

Sexicon for lovers and others: LETTER L

LESBIAN: A term that is commonly used to describe a homosexual woman, or sexual and romantic relationship between women. The word “lesbian” comes from the name of the Greek island of Lesbos, the birthplace of an ancient Greek poetess Sappho. Lesbian sexual behaviors may include various forms of kissing and caressing, nipple play, sexual fingering, digital intercourse, cunnilingus, anilingus, tribadism (aka scissoring), use of sex toys. Tribadism, also known as “scissoring”, is a form of non-penetrative sex between two women. This is a form of lesbian lovemaking in which women are rubbing and pressing their pussies against each other. As to sex toys homosexual women choose to play with, they vary from different types of clitoral and G-spot vibrators, dildos, double dildos, non-phallic vibrators, strap-ons, etc.

LABIA: Labia majora and labia minora are external female sex organs. Labia majora and labia minora enclose the vaginal and urethral opening and are often referred to as ‘pussy lips’. Labia majora is the thicker, outside labia, covered with hair. Labia minora is the inner labia that may vary in size from woman to woman. Labia majora and labia minora are very erogenous areas in many women!

LIBIDO: A term, popularized by founder of psychoanalysis, Sigmund Freud, which is commonly used to denote a sexual energy, sexual desire, sexual drive, sexual instinct; psychic and emotional energy associated with sexual instinct. The term comes from the New Latin ‘libidin’ (desire, lust), and from ‘libere’ (to please). There are psychological and physical causes that can affect libido. The psychological causes may include stress, body image concerns, distraction, depression, etc. Physical factors may include the side effects of some medicines, hormonal imbalances, lifestyle factors, etc.

LINGAM: Lingam (pronounced LING-AHM) is the Sanskrit word for the male sexual organ, penis, or a representation of the penis; a phallic symbol. Lingam is the Hindu phallic symbol of Siva. The term is often used in Tantric sexuality. Lingam massage is a very sensual and honoring massage of male penis and its surroundings. Believe me, lingam massage is a special experience for both a giver and receiver. Some of the purposes of the massage are showing love and respect for this beautiful part of your man’s body, releasing his fears and expanding his ability to relax and receive pleasure. The Lingam massage may help men to learn to control premature ejaculation. The Sanskrit word for the vagina is Yoni.

LUBRICANT: A personal lubricant, often referred to as “lube” or “sex lube”, is a liquid meant for using during various sexual acts. Sexual lubricants help to reduce friction and enhance pleasure during sex. Although men and women both produce their own lubrication, extra lubrication is always helpful because sex is better when wetter. Some couples consider lubricants as an interruption, because it takes time to apply a lube, however, even the very act of lubricating your lover’s private part may be very, very intimate and sensual process.

A wide range of lubricants is available today. There are water-based, oil-based and silicone based lubes. There are lubes specifically designed to enhance anal sex, or oral sex, or masturbation. Lovers can choose from warming lubricants, edible lubricants, prolonging lubes, jack off lubes, and other. Many anal lubricants contain a numbing agent ‘benzocaine’, that will numb the anal area for reducing painful sensation during anal penetration. Warming lubricants cause a heating sensation in the skin. Water-based lubricants are generally considered all-purpose lubes. They can be used with sex toys and for various sexual activities. Oil-based lubricants are good too, they are usually made from natural oils, don’t cause irritation, but are difficult to wash off and tend to stain fabrics and destroy latex. Silicone-based lubricants are waterproof and fantastic for water fun, but these lubes are not recommended for use with silicone-based sex toys.

LYGERASTIA: Lygerastia is the tendency to become sexually aroused in total darkness. The word comes from ‘lyge’ (twilight), and ‘erastes’ (lover). There is also an Amaurophilia, which comes from ‘amaurosis’ (blindness), and ‘philia’ (attraction). Amaurophilia is sexual preference for a blind or blindfolded sex partner or for having sex in darkness.

LOVE’S CHANEL: Love’s channel is a slang word for pussy. Other words for vagina are love tunnel, lady flower, little girl, little front butt, little sister, lotus, lotus flower, love box, love canal, love jungle, love’s paradise, love’s pavilion, lower smile, lowlands, lunch box, lower mouth.

LOLITA: Lolita is a slang word for a seductive, sexually attractive, or sexually precocious young girl, who is the object of sexual desire of a significantly older man. The word is also applied to describe a female sexual behavior/sexuality. The name “Lolita” comes from a widely known novel Lolita, by Vladimir Nabokov. The novel was first written in English and published in 1955, in Paris. The book tells about a story of middle-aged Humbert, who becomes obsessed with a 12-year-old girl Dolores (also known as Dolly, Lolita, Lola).

Now here you have eight sexual definitions. No, I didn’t forget about LOVE and LUST :) I just decided to not give the definitions of these as my guess is that everyone has his or her own definition of what is love and lust. Some think that it’s so difficult to tell when you are in love or is it lust. In my opinion, there is the difference. Love is more about the connection of souls and desiring the best for the person you love. Lust is mainly about an intense and strong sexual desire and self-gratification.

Love vs lust… Hmm, I’m wishing you a little bit of this, and a little bit of that ;)

Ben Wa Balls Types And Tips

Nellioness — Mon, 29 Mar 2010 04:58:16 +0000

I am back with more information on these simple yet popular and nice Ben Wa Balls. Let me describe some popular types of Ben Wa Balls and point out some tips, ideas and safety instructions.

Today, Ben Wa Balls come in a variety of designs, sizes and materials including steel, plastic, glass. Some Ben Wa Balls are connected by a string. Other types of the balls are connected together with a beautiful silicone coating. I must admit that modern Ben Wa Balls are not only great for exercising your PC muscles, but they are real pieces of art.

Types of Ben Wa Balls

Traditional Ben Wa Balls

Traditional Ben Wa Balls are very simple objects which are simple to use. They are small, marble-sized, weighted balls, made of metal. Metal Ben Wa balls are hygienically safe and very easy to clean. They are more durable than any other balls. Traditional Ben Wa Balls may be useful for Kegel exercises, but they are usually not so useful as a sexual enhancer.

Duotone Balls

Duotone balls usually come in a variety of different colors, designs and materials. They are typically larger than the traditional Ben Wa balls and they may be somewhat difficult to insert and manipulate with the internal muscles. Duotone balls are hollow balls which contain a small metal weight inside that bounces and rolls around during your body movement. They are connected by a string and have a retrieval cord on one end for easy removal. The size of Duotone balls is usually about 1 1/2 inches in diameter. These balls are usually made from plastic, metal, silicone, or rubber. Duotone Balls are also referred to as orgasm balls, love balls, and pleasure balls.

Smart Balls

Smart Balls are the two weighted balls coated in soft silicone or rubber and connected together with a flexible bridge of the same material. Smart Balls are durable and easy to clean. These balls are usually about 4 inches long and 1 1/4 inches in diameter. Smart Balls are typically very pleasing, both physically and visually.

Vibrating Balls

As the name suggests, vibrating balls produce vibration. These balls feature a controller for you to choose the speed of vibration. Vibrating balls are often referred to as Vibro Balls.

Kegel Balls

Kegel balls, or K-balls, are designed to enhance the effect of Kegel exercises. They are relatively large and encapsulated usually by silicone. Inside the silicone capsule there are weighted balls.

Graduated Balls

Graduated balls are usually 3 to 4 balls of different sizes – small, medium, and large. The balls are connected together through a retrieval nylon cord. Some people use graduated balls for their anal explorations. Personally, I do not recommend using any Ben Wa balls and their versions anally.

Glass Balls

Balls made of glass usually combine an arty design and functionality. Glass balls are easy to insert and very easy to remove. They are also easy to clean, non-porous, phthalates free and hypo-allergenic. They are well sized and weighted for effective vaginal exercise. Glass balls make a really great gift!

Basic Tips & Safety Instructions

Whatever the version and type of balls you choose to use, I recommend using Ben Wa Balls with common sense. As I’ve mentioned in my previous post, I do not recommend going out with Ben Wa balls and using them in public. Ben Wa Balls are designed for intimate use and not intended to be used in public places.

Although many sources suggest wearing the balls inside the vagina during vaginal intercourse, I do not think it is a good idea. You see, in fact, keeping the balls inside may mentally distract you during sex, and you will be having trouble focusing and concentrating on each other.

I also do not advice using Ben Wa balls with an insertable vibrator at the same time. Such a combination of sexual devices may decrease your pleasure and it may be for you quite tricky to get accustomed to the sensations. While wearing the balls inside, you can use any vibrator on the clitoris. Believe me that you will derive much more pleasure from a combination of Ben Wa balls and a hands-free clitoral vibrator, such as for example any strap-on clitoral vibrator.

As to using Ben Wa balls anally, I recommend just choosing a sex toy specifically designed and formed for that purpose. Ben Wa balls are not basically intended for anal insertion. Anal beads or butt plug will be a better choice. You can use anal beads while keeping Ben Wa balls inside your pussy.

As with any other sex toy, using a lubricant (when you are sitting or lying down) with Ben Wa balls may be quite helpful. However, the balls may slip out when you start walking around.

To place the balls inside, lie down, spread your legs and slowly insert them into your vagina, one by one. This process is similar to inserting a tampon. Be very careful if you have long nails. To pull the balls out you can lift up one leg and cough, or jump up and down, or just use a lubricant to help them slide out. Also, do not forget to wash your hands and Ben Wa Balls before insertion. Keep the balls clean after each use.

If you are a first time user, do not choose metal balls as they tend to slip out of the vagina if you have weak PC muscles. Choose the balls with a retrieval cord as these are easier to remove and manipulate. And of course, the larger balls are easier to hold by your PC muscles.

One great way to enjoy Ben Wa balls is choosing those versions where the balls are connected by a string. Insert one ball deep inside and let another ball hang out.

Do not use Ben Wa balls if you have serious gynecological problems, or a tampon, or birth control device inside your pussy.

Strengthening your pelvic floor muscles is very beneficial for women in many aspects. Stronger, tighter and sensitive vagina leads to more intense orgasms and better sex life overall. Although the pleasure-inducing properties of Ben Wa Balls are very disputable, one thing is for sure: Ben Wa Balls are great for exploring your sensual side and exercising your PC muscles. Take care of your sexual health and have fun!

Ben Wa Balls – What They Are And How They Work

Nellioness — Fri, 26 Mar 2010 10:31:36 +0000

Many of us have heard of Ben Wa Balls. Ben Wa balls, also known as Pleasure Balls, Orgasm Balls, Love Balls, Duotone Balls, Kegel Balls and Smart Balls are surrounded by hype, many myths and various opinions.

Today I want to talk about Ben Wa Balls, what are they and how do they work. Personally, my experience dictates that these marvelous balls are more useful as vaginal exerciser and less useful as an erotic stimulator which can make you orgasm. In fact, the larger the balls – the larger and more pronounced the whole sensation, stimulation and effect. It seems to me that it is kind of naive to think that Ben Wa Balls can provide you with immediate orgasm. However, while wearing them for some time they may produce very, very, very pleasurable sensations, slight arousal and tease.

As to the origin of Ben Wa Balls, they are known to have been invented hundreds of years ago. Ben Wa balls are said to originate in Japan where they were called Rin No Tama, meaning “tinkling bells”. Most information about Ben Wa Balls background and invention is mainly a legend-like. There is a claim that they were originally designed to provide a man with enhanced pleasure during intercourse. Then, it was found that Ben Wa Balls produce more pleasurable sensations on ladies rather than on guys. It is said that women inserted the balls into the pussy, then rock back and forth in a rocking chair causing the balls float in the vag and massaging the sensitive walls.

The traditional Ben Wa Balls are simple objects. They are usually small round balls, weighted, hollow and containing a small weight that rolls around inside the ball to cause vibrations. The initial idea behind Ben Wa Balls is not bringing a woman to orgasms, it is increasing the vaginal walls elasticity and sensitivity. And when the pussy is tight and sensitive, this enables a woman to experience more pronounced and greater sensations during sex.

You can place the balls in the vagina and wear them for an hour of more. Some ladies try wearing Ben Wa Balls the whole day while doing their everyday activities. The idea is to use your pelvic muscles to hold the balls inside the pussy. For g-spot massage, some ladies place the balls just where the g-spot is located. Overall degree of sexual stimulation and effect depends on the size of the balls and the vaginal muscles tightness.

How To Use Ben Wa Balls

To place the balls inside the pussy, lie down, spread your legs and slowly insert them into your vagina with your fingers, one by one. Basically, this is the same process as inserting a tampon. Our pussy, ladies, is a sensitive diva, so be very careful if you have long nails. Also, do not forget to wash Ben Wa Balls before inserting them inside your pleasure hole. Do not use the balls if you have serious gynecological problems, or a tampon or birth control device inside the pussy.

In order to hold the balls inside, try squeezing your pelvic floor muscles and contract your vagina. Tighten your muscles around the balls and squeeze, then count 10 seconds. Then release your muscles for 10 seconds and repeat 10 times. To remove the balls, you can lift up one leg and cough, or jump up and down. Don’t worry. Ben Wa Balls cannot get lost in your pussy. If you still can’t pull them out – just use a lubricant and the balls will slide out.

Ben Wa Balls As Erotic Enhancer and Stimulator

As I’ve mentioned earlier, do not expect Ben Wa Balls to provide you with immediate orgasms. In fact, these balls are not designed with “orgasm” in mind. However, Ben Wa Balls do produce very pleasurable sensations and slight arousal. Ben Wa Balls are a fantastic tool for exploring your sensual side and your “vaginal” erotic potential. A feeling of fullness while wearing the balls is very stimulating, both physically and psychologically. However, your overall sensation and pleasure-inducing effect depends on the size and type of the balls you use, as well as on your vagina tightness. In fact, your pussy is forced to contract around the balls in order to hold them inside. And these “forced contractions” may produce some arousal. Besides, in order to feel more pronounced sensations, you need to move actively. For example, you can place the balls inside (using a lubricant may be helpful), sit down, squeeze your legs and start rocking back and forth. Some creative ladies use the balls while riding a bicycle or a horse. One more tip is that you can choose the balls which are connected by a string. Then insert one ball deep inside and let another ball hang out.

Ben Wa Balls As Kegel Exerciser

Strengthening your pelvic floor muscles is the main purpose and benefit behind Ben Wa Balls. The ability to receive orgasms and the intensity of an orgasm directly depends on the strength of the PC muscles. The PC muscle or the pubococcygeus is the same muscle you contract when you try not to pee. This muscle controls urine flow and contracts during orgasm. The PC muscle controls all sexual functions in both men and women. It forms and supports the urethra, bladder, vagina, penis, uterus and rectum. Therefore, a strong pubococcygeus muscle can help to enhance orgasms. With proper use, Ben Wa Balls can be very helpful as a Kegel exerciser. Generally, Kegel exercises involve two main actions: squeezing and relaxing the muscle. So, insert the balls inside and squeeze. Count 10 seconds. Then release your muscles for 10 seconds and repeat 10 times. Exercising your vagina with Ben Wa balls is kind of like increasing weights at the gym. Doing these exercises several times each day will make your vagina tighter, more sensitive and able to reach orgasms quite easily.

Whether you use Ben Wa Balls for Kegel exercises or as sexual stimulator, they should be used safely and with common sense. In fact, as Ben Wa Balls and Kegel-type devices have stood the test of time, they are not so useless. However, I do not recommend going out with Ben Wa balls and using them in public. I also do not advice using Ben Wa balls anally. Although many sources suggest keeping the balls in the vagina during intercourse or while playing with an insertable vibrator, personally, I do not think it is a good idea. Ben Wa Balls and other Kegel-type devices are designed for intimate use.

In my next post, I’m going to describe some basic types of Ben Wa Balls and give some tips and safety instructions. See you very soon with more info on these fun and simple objects!

Kegel Exercises For Men And Women – Helpful Tips, Nice Ideas, Simple Techniques

Nellioness — Mon, 22 Mar 2010 17:35:19 +0000

Almost every adult, whether a man or a woman, has heard of Kegel exercises. However, not everyone actually knows what Kegel exercises really are. So, let’s talk a little bit about the benefits of Kegel exercises for male and female health – what they are good for, how to do them, and much more.

Importance of Kegel Exercise and PC muscle

Kegel exercises were developed by and named for Doctor Kegel. The idea behind the Kegels is to strengthen the pubococcygeus muscle, or the PC muscle.

In scientific terms, the pubococcygeus muscle is a hammock-like muscle which stretches from the pubic bone to the tail bone (coccyx) and forms the floor of the pelvic cavity supporting the pelvic organs. The PC muscle is found in both sexes.

The pubococcygeus muscle controls urine flow and contracts during orgasm. It forms and supports the urethra, bladder, vagina, penis, uterus and rectum, and controls all sexual functions in both men and women. A strong and developed pubococcygeus muscle can help to enhance orgasms in both sexes. Kegel exercises help improve muscle tone by strengthening the pubococcygeus muscles.

Anyone can learn how to do Kegel exercises. The most fantastic thing about Kegels is that they are very easy to do. Moreover, you can do these simple exercises at almost any place and at any time. If done properly and regularly, the effects are always significant and beneficial. Sorry to disappoint some of you, but for most men and women, it usually takes from three to six weeks (or more) to notice the change. Kegel exercises do not have to take more than 10-15 minutes and about 200-300 contractions each day.

Benefits For Men

In fact, Kegel exercise help men control premature ejaculation and improve sexual function. Kegels can help men achieve stronger erections and give great control over ejaculation.This exercise also lifts up the balls and helps strengthening the anal sphincter. By learning to contract the PC muscle during sex, a man can significantly increase the pleasure for both himself and his lady. Imagine how proud you will be being able to satisfy your woman and last-longer every time you have sex. To discover your pubococcygeus muscle, try to stop the stream of urine midway. A muscle which contracts – is your PC muscle.

- Firmer and longer erections
- Ejaculation control
- Control over premature ejaculation
- Strengthening the anal sphincter
- Increased pleasure during sex
- Becoming a better lover

Benefits For Women

Kegel exercises are very, very, VERY beneficial for women in many aspects. Generally, strengthening the PC muscles leads to vaginal tightness, in other words, stronger vagina. Stronger, tighter and more sensitive vagina leads to more intense orgasms and better sex life overall. Strong pelvic floor muscles make it easier to orgasm. The ability of a woman to rhythmically contract and release the vaginal muscles helps to enhance her own orgasms and gives her man out-of-the-world pleasure. Plus, Kegels are very beneficial for women in their child-bearing years. If a woman has strong PC muscles, it makes childbirth easier and helps to regain more quickly after giving birth.

- Vagina becomes stronger, tighter and more sensitive
- Strengthening the PC muscles can help to reach more intense and powerful orgasms as the muscles you exercise are the same as used in climaxing
- The ability to rhythmically contract and release the vaginal muscles and squeeze a man’s penis
- Increased pleasure during sex and a better sex life overall
- Reducing pelvic floor muscle problems such as prolapse and mild urinary incontinence
- Make childbirth easier, and muscles will regain more quickly after giving birth

How to discover the PC muscle

Learning to locate and use the right muscles is the key. To discover your PC muscle, next time you are urinating, try to stop in mid-flow. The pubococcygeus muscle is the same muscle you contract when you try not to pee. Remember that this is only a way to find the muscle, and Kegels should not be done when peeing.

How to do Kegels

Generally, Kegel exercises involve two basic actions – squeezing and relaxing the muscle. The easiest way to do Kegels is contracting the muscle, holding it for a count of 10, and then completely relaxing. You can squeeze, hold for ten second, then release and relax for ten seconds, and repeat ten times, for example. Do this several times each day, at any place and any time. You can exercise at work, walking, watching TV, sitting, etc. Women can even do Kegels during sex – tighten your pelvic muscles to grip his penis and then relax. During Kegel exercises, do not use your stomach, leg, back and buttock muscles.

Kegel Exercise Techniques

These exercises can be done by everyone. They are simple and very fun to do, in fact. Moreover, when exercising, you can get sexually aroused. So, Kegels are not only simple, they are even very pleasurable and arousing to do. Do these exercises for 15-20 minutes each day and feel the effects!

Exercise 1

Squeeze a little your PC muscle, and count 10
Squeeze a little more, and count 10
Tighten as hard as possible, and count 10
Release and fully relax your PC muscles, and count 5 seconds
Do exercise in reverse steps
Tighten as hard as possible, and count 10
Squeeze a little more, and count 10
Squeeze a little your PC muscle, and count 10
Release and fully relax your PC muscles

Exercise 2

Release and fully relax your PC muscles. Repeat for about 10 times. Do this Kegel exercising session at least 2-3 times per day and daily.

Squeeze fast – release fast
Squeeze fast – release fast
Squeeze fast – release fast
Squeeze fast – release fast
Squeeze fast – release fast
Squeeze fast – release fast
Squeeze fast – release fast
Squeeze fast – release fast
Squeeze fast – release fast
Squeeze fast – release fast

Exercise 3

Imagine you are trying to hold something in your vagina. Hold for 10 seconds. Release and repeat 10 times.

Exercise 4

Find a rhythmic music. Just listen to three songs, for example, that have absolutely different rhythms. Squeeze and release your PC muscle under the rhythms.

Using Kegel Exercisers and Ben Wa Balls

Today, for women, there are many exercisers for vaginal muscles designed to increase vaginal elasticity and strengthen PC muscle. These sex toys and devices are often referred to as vaginal exercisers and Ben Wa Balls. Ben Wa Balls are often referred to as Kegel Balls, vaginal weights, orgasm balls, pleasure balls, Smart balls, love balls, Duotone balls. Ben Wa Balls and Kegel exercisers are designed, sized and formed specifically. So, they are fantastic for strengthening the PC muscles.

Ladies can choose from a variety of Kegel exercisers. Many types of Ben Wa Balls are made from metal and are weighted, and you have to use your vaginal muscles to hold them inside. Other versions of Ben Wa Balls are made of glass and other non-porous and safe materials. Duotone balls are much larger than the traditional Ben Wa balls. Duotone balls contain a smaller weighted ball inside that rolls around during movement. Kegel exercisers and Ben Wa Balls are designed so that you can exercise and have fun at the same time!

For better sex life and enhanced pleasure, remember to practice Kegel exercises and tone your PC muscles. Adjust them to your time schedule and exercise regularly. Finally, women will be able to control vaginal muscles and reach more powerful and intense orgasms. Men will be able to control ejaculation and perform longer. Both men and women will have a greatly increased pleasure during lovemaking. For more enjoyment and fun, try exercising while having sex!

Time For A Good Giggle About Sex – 8 Dirty Jokes!

Nellioness — Tue, 16 Mar 2010 05:13:41 +0000

I am in a playful mood today :) So I decided it is the time to have a good giggle again. They say that a smile is an effective remedy for the soul, and a minute of a good giggle prolongs life. In this in mind, I have previously posted many sex jokes. Now I have collected new ones to brighten your day and make you smile. Here I have eight lovely jokes about sex and things sexual. I hope you will enjoy these and share yours!

Always keep your condoms in your car

I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way. My friends encouraged me. And my girlfriend? She was a dream!

There was only one thing bothering me very much, and that one thing was her younger sister. My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight miniskirts and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when quite near me and I got a pleasant view of her underwear. It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else.

One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn’t overcome and didn’t really want to overcome. She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. I was in total shock and couldn’t say a word.

She said, “I’m going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me.” I was stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me. I stood there for a moment, then turned and went straight to the front door. I opened the door and stepped out of the house.

I walked straight towards my car.

My future father-in-law was standing outside. With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, “We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn’t ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family.”

The moral of this story: Always keep your condoms in your car!

Bad Example

One day, two very loving parents got into a huge fight – the man called the woman a “bitch” and the woman called the man a “bastard”. Their son walked in and asked “What does bitch and bastard mean?” And the parents replied “ladies and gentlemen”.

The next day, the parents decided to have sex. The woman said “feel my titties” and the man said “feel my dick”. Their son walked in and asked “What does titties and dick mean?” And the parents replied “hats and coats”.

On Thanksgiving the dad was shaving and he cut himself, “Shit” he said, and the kid came in and asked “What’s that mean”. The man said it was the brand shaving cream he was using.

Downstairs the mom was preparing the turkey, and she cut herself, saying “Fuck”. Once again the kid asked “What’s that mean”, and the mom said that is what she calls stuffing the turkey.

Then the door bell rang. The kid answered the door to his relatives and said:

“Alright you bitches and bastards, put your dicks and titties in the closet, my dad is upstairs wiping the shit off his face, and my mom is in the kitchen fucking the turkey!”

Daughter’s Letter To Dad

A father entered his daughter’s bedroom and saw a letter on the bed. He read it with trembling hands.
“Dear Mum and Dad,

It is with great regret and sorrow that I’m telling you that I’ve eloped with my new boyfriend. I’ve found real love and he is so nice, especially with all his piercings, scars, tattoos, and his big motorcycle. But it’s not only that. I’m pregnant. And Ahmed said that we will be very happy in his trailer in the woods. He wants to have many more children with me and that’s one of my dreams. I’ve learned that marijuana doesn’t hurt anyone and we’ll be growing it for us and his friends. They’re the ones providing us with all the cocaine and ecstasy we could ever want. In the meantime, we’ll pray for science to find the AIDS cure, so Ahmed gets better. He deserves it. Please do not worry about money. Ahmed has arranged for me to be in films that his friends Leroy and Jamal make in their basement. Apparently I can earn £50 a scene. I get a £50 bonus if there are more than three men in the scene, and an extra £100 if they use the horse. Don’t worry Mum. Now I’m 15 years old, and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I’ll visit you and Dad so that you can meet your grandchildren.
Your loving daughter,
Aimee

PS: Dad, it’s not true. I’m watching TV at a neighbor’s house. I just wanted to show you that there are worse things in life than England getting fucked on penalties again. I love you.”

The Stuck Vibrator

A lady called her gynecologist, and asked for an “emergency” appointment. The receptionist said to come right in. She rushed to the office, and was ushered right into an examination room. The doctor came into the exam room and asked about her problem. She was very shy about her emergency problem, and asked the gynecologist to please examine her vagina.

The doctor started to examine her. He stuck up his head after completing his examination. “I’m sorry, Miss,” he said, “but removing that vibrator is going to involve a very lengthy, delicate and expensive surgical operation.”

“I’m not sure I can afford it,” sighed the young woman. “But while I am here could you just replace the batteries?”

Dirty Penis

A wife catches her husband masturbating under the shower and approaches him. The husband:

- Oh dear, it was so dirty that I had to rub it so hard… you know, it almost hurts!

Sex scream “competition”

Three friends decided to bet each other $100 on who could make their wives scream more from sex. They all go home to have sex with their wives and make them scream. The next day they meet.

The first friend says, “I made love to my wife for 2 hours and she was screaming for at least 1 1/2 hours.” The second friend says, “That’s nothing, I start licking my wife for two hours and she was screaming the whole time and half hour after that.”

The third friend says, “That’s nothing, I made love to my wife for ten minutes. I came a couple times and wiped my dick in the curtain. She is still screaming.”

A night with the princess

A King had to leave his Kingdom for some business. He was afraid that his only Daughter would be taken advantage of by some of the Guards because she was a very deep sleeper. So, before he left, he slipped a razor blade between the lips of her vagina. The King left. That night, three of the Guards did plan to fuck the Princess.

The First Guard went into her room. From outside of the room, the other two Guards listened. Suddenly, they heard the First Guard scream. He came out. The other two Guards asked why he screamed. Embarrassed, he said that it was so good that he couldn’t control himself. This made the other two smile.

The Second Guard went in. After some time? Ahhhhh!!! The Second Guard came out. The Third Guard asked what happened. Just as embarrassed as the First Guard, the Second Guard said that it felt so good that he couldn’t control himself. The Third Guard smiled.

The Third Guard went into the room. He went up to the Princess and lifted her dress. Outside, the other two Guards listened. Mmmmmhhhh!?! The other two Guards took off!

The next morning, the King came back. He suspected that his Guards tried to fuck his daughter. He told them to drop their pants. Each of them did. Two of them had sliced dicks, but the third one didn’t. Confused, the King asked why. He stuck his tongue out and said: “I neba pry fuk ur dahta, I wet lik ur dahta?!”

There came a moment in my life when I realized that sex does not have to be always serious. I want you to approach things sexual with a smile and positive attitude. As I said in my previous posts, start every day with a smile and an orgasm, because every day spend without a smile and orgasm – is a lost day.

See you later ;)